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20 Questions to Get to Know Someone

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Because getting to know someone is a little easier if you can get a conversation started, you may want to use some of the questions on this list of 20 Questions to Get to Know Someone. Though you do not want to intimidate your new friend with a barrage of questions, asking a few questions can let a person know you are interested in learning more about him or her.

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What can you learn from asking questions?

Listen closely to the answers you get from the list of 20 Questions to Get to Know Someone. These answers will give insight into the other person's interests and opinions on various subjects. If your new friend can't name a favorite restaurant, you may assume that he or she does not necessarily like to dine out. If you ask where a person likes to go on the weekend, you may find out that the individual is a passionate hiker or volunteer. The attitude conveyed in the response is as important as the content of the answer to the question.

Does body language make a difference?

Pay attention to body language when you are having a conversation with a new acquaintance. Is the person leaning towards you and looking at you? If so, he or she is most likely interested in the conversation and the topic is of importance to them. If the individual is looking away from you and speaking in brief sentences, he or she may be disinterested or uncomfortable about the topic. If this is the case, do not beleaguer the point; simply move on.

Is listening important?

Being a good listener is important when getting to know someone. Look at the other person while speaking, do not interrupt him or her, and pay attention to what the individual is telling you.

Should you be prepared to answer questions in return?

Another important factor in getting to know another person is answering the questions he or she asks you. It can become uncomfortable being the only one doing the talking. Be sure to offer your own answers to the question you asked, even if the other person does not inquire. Sometimes people are unsure what to ask you, and giving brief information about yourself will convey that you are comfortable about communicating rather than simply being nosy.

20 Questions to Get to Know Someone

There are several different topics you can discuss to get acquainted with a new person. People often have many things in common such as jobs, children, pets, and living situations. Here are some questions to open the door for more detailed conversations.

Topics Like Belly Buttons—We All Have 'Em

Current events, complaints, and daily activities are usually safe bets for getting more than a one word answer.

  • What are you doing over the holiday weekend?
  • Have you heard about the new (insert new local business or event)?
  • Where do you work?
  • Doesn't (insert pet peeve here) drive you crazy?

Blast From the Past

Childhood nostalgia is usually a comfortable topic that allows people to have a few "Really? Me, too!" moments.

  • Did you grow up here?
  • What was your favorite musical group when you were in Junior High?
  • What school activities did you participate in?
  • Where were you born?

Family Affair

People's families are usually important to them, and are a source of interesting and often funny anecdotes.

  • Do you have any siblings?
  • Where did your family go for vacations in the summer?
  • What jobs did your parents do?
  • What did you call your grandparents? (ex. Grammy, Grandpa, etc.)

Pets

If the person you are talking with has a pet, you can bet they will love to tell you about it.

  • Do you have a pet?
  • What were your childhood pets?
  • How old is your pet?

Funny and Obscure

Sometimes the best ice breakers are humorous or unusual. It can be fun to questions that make people laugh or requires them to stop and think about the answer for a moment. Most likely they will fire the same question back at you.

  • What is on your bedside table?
  • Do you still have tonsils?
  • Coke or Pepsi?
  • If you could be a crayon, what color would you be?

That's a Very Good Question

Make mental note of the types of questions that give you the best responses. You may wish to use them as conversation starters in other situations. If a person seems uncomfortable with a family question, that may be the time to move right on to a basic question such as "What movies have you seen recently?" Once the conversation begins to flow, the questions will come more naturally, but until then it is a good idea to have a few conversation starters in mind.

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